For anyone desperately seeking Susan…or perhaps Dave these are top tips.

If you have been unlucky in love it can be hard to keep upbeat while you are searching for someone special. Here are eight things to keep in mind to help you stay positive when dating again.

1. Be realistic

Although it would be fantastic if your first new date was with The One, this is pretty unlikely. Accept that it may take time to find your perfect match and relax and enjoy your dating experiences without worrying too much about finding love straight away.

2. Have a life outside of your relationship

Don’t let all your happiness stem from your relationships. Keep yourself busy by doing things you love. Make time for friends and family, pick up a new hobby, curl up with your favourite book or spend some well-deserved time pampering yourself.

3. Break your dating habits

Don’t get stuck in a dating rut. Meeting four first dates in the same place each time makes it hard to see each new person as an individual. Make the most of your dating experience by doing new things and trying out unusual bars and exotic restaurants.

4. Exercise

Regular exercise helps you feel refreshed, more energised and better about yourself. It also boosts your endorphins, helping you to enter your first date with a positive outlook.

5. Don’t repeat your dating mistakes

If you are falling into traps with the same sort of guy then try dating a type you haven’t considered before. Branch out and cast the net wider and you could be pleasantly surprised with who you find.

However, it is important to still look for people who share the same key values as you, so if you are looking for love on an online dating site such as eHarmony.co.uk, try to search for people who share your cultural heritage.

For example, if your roots are in Africa then look at the profiles of other African singles. Look for people with similar hobbies, taste in music etc as yourself.

6. Treat each new person as an individual

Don’t project your ex’s bad qualities on to your new date. Each time you meet a potential partner wipe the slate clean and give them a chance to show you who they really are.

7. Take a break

If you are getting frustrated by bad dates then take a break. Plan how long you need to take off and think about where you might be going wrong. Try again with a fresh start and a positive outlook and hopefully things will start to go better.

8. Smile and stay positive

Don’t let a bad date get you down. See it as a learning experience. Keep positive and keep trying and remember to smile! Smiling and laughter are infectious so entering a first date with a positive attitude will make it more likely to be successful.

The key to dating success is to keep trying. If you are worried you are doing something wrong then get advice from the people you trust. Do things in your life that make you happy and you will gain a positive attitude which will help you to have a happier and more successful dating experience.

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